This little drawing personifies my relationship with my husband where my depression is concerned.
I’m often very angry, and most of the time, I can’t explain why. Though I don’t feel much because of how I repress my feelings, I do feel a lot of rage and anger. Most of the time, I take this rage out on my poor husband. I can’t help myself and I haven’t been able to stop it. By the time I realize I’m angry, it’s too late because the damage would’ve been done.
So I often feel like I’m burning him up with my rage and while he is getting burned, he still fights to come towards me – to comfort me and hold me. That is what I feel this drawing is trying to convey.
I’m working on it, of course, through therapy but sometimes I feel like I can’t recover soon enough because of how much pain I bring to the person I love the most. (Not to mention how much my conscious me is trying to fight the recovery process as well which complicates matters)