Out of Control

My ADHD is out of control.

It’s been out of control for the past week or so now. The Strattera is obviously not helping and because it’s been keeping me drowsy so much lately, I’ve decided to stop taking it. As a result, for the past couple of days or so, I’ve been extremely depressed. Sure, I’ve had reasons to be depressed as well but I think the fact that I stopped taking the medication is also contributing to the depression.

I’m not sure what to do at this point because I really don’t want to be drowsy and exhausted all the time so I don’t really want to continue taking the Strattera but I’m also no doctor which means that I probably shouldn’t be messing around with medications without consulting my psychiatrist. I’m supposed to see her a couple of weeks from now so I’m not sure if I should be calling her up to get her opinion on things or just wait.

I’m just a little worried for the next couple of weeks because not only will S be leaving on paternity leave for a couple of weeks, school will also be starting next Monday. Since I’m taking on so many new things, I really need to be on top of my game. I’m just wondering if I should go back to the Ritalin and just ignore the Strattera.

Sigh. I’ve been hating life and hating myself these few days – particularly since my ADHD symptoms have been aggravated which is contributing to my anxiety which in turn is contributing to my depression.

I feel like I’m going insane inside my own head. Don’t you just hate that feeling?

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6 thoughts on “Out of Control

  1. mentalbreakinprogress says:

    (((BIG GIANT HUGS))) Sorry you’re going through this right now Jules! šŸ˜¦ xo I can relate to not wanting to be drowsy all the time and stuff but I agree that maybe you should let your psychiatrist handle the adjustment. Is it possible they could see you sooner if you made a call to let them know what’s up? No worries you’re not going insane or you wouldn’t even be able to write this post lol ā¤ You just remember you're awesome no matter what your brain is screaming at you right now. Remember, we're basically twins so I know what I would do and that's try to adjust my meds myself…and I have done that…and note to self…not a good idea lol (((hugs)))

    Liked by 1 person

    • JL says:

      Thanks so much, Cavelle! Yeah, I’ll see if I can’t ask or call her up next week. It’s just that when you’re constantly hearing “chatter” in your head because of the unceasing thoughts, it’s easy to feel like you’re going insane. Haha.. Thanks very much. You’re a comfort!

      Liked by 1 person

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