Since starting Strattera and Zoloft, I haven’t had any anxiety attacks or anything like that in a while now. I mean my mind still goes on overdrive in self-criticism but nothing as bad as it used to be when I was on Ritalin. That said, as I drove to CAPS yesterday, I started experiencing anxiety […]
There’s crying. Then, there’s the I-am-so-distressed-that-I-can’t-stop-bawling-and-my-sinuses-are-blocked kind of crying. The latter was me today. Almost as soon as I sat down, I told S that I was not in a good state. That last week leading up to today had been so rough that I can barely hold myself up. He was concerned, as evident […]
Today’s session with S had been emotionally and physically exhausting. It wasn’t his fault of course. Rather, it was all of the things that I talked to him about; all the things I made myself feel all at once today. I was overwhelmed this past week and I had numbed myself through it all until […]
-Potential trigger warning: This post contains content that deal with childhood sexual trauma and self-harming thoughts. Note that this is also going to be a really long post.- It is a strange thing that I feel that I deserve more compassion when I see myself as someone else than when I see myself in the […]
Just like Monday’s session, and every session I’ve ever had, Wednesday’s session with S started with him asking me how I was. I told him that I am not as good as I “should” be – to which he responded in an amused tone, “Not as good as you should?”
After the incredible session with S on Monday, I had one that I felt really unsatisfied with on Wednesday. I was unsatisfied because I was in a confused state of mind so for the first half an hour, we talked about something that I didn’t feel was very important and didn’t hit the points that […]
I believe S and I are getting closer to my eventual acceptance of who I am, as far as my sexuality is concerned. I believe I’m close because of the topic we covered on Monday’s session and also because of how I’m internally freaking out – my mind is finding ways to deny this progress […]
Bear with me here, all of my readers who aren’t nerdy, as this post will relate to my mental health struggles in one way or another despite the nerdy content. I recently bought a car – a used 2015 KIA Soul that happened to be black in color – on Star Wars Day, i.e. May […]
Sometimes I feel a little embarrassed when S talks to me the way an adult would talk to a child. “That would be nice, huh?” He had said to me near the end of our session today. His voice was kind but also sounded like something you’d tell a little crying child. Something soothing but […]
As I was revising the information that I had to know for the completion exam for the Health and Wellness Promotions Leaders Academy, I came across something very interesting in the “Spiritual Health” module that I had accidentally skipped. It says under “Spiritual Atrophy” that someone who is experiencing spiritual atrophy have the following traits: […]
Hitting Reset 