Suicidality 

If you Google, “How to tie a noose”, the first result that comes up is a message assuring you that help is available and to call a crisis line number.  I told S that today and he responded with an enthusiastic, “That’s cool!”  While I do agree with him wholeheartedly that it is cool, I […]

Emergency Session With S

I practically made S run out of his office to meet me today. I feel embarrassed to say that I not only had a walk-in session today before my group therapy session, but that I also had group therapy, AND I also requested to see S.

Last Night Before Huge Changes 

Tonight is the last night I’ll ever spend in this apartment. From tomorrow onwards, my life will be a complete 180.  I have yet to figure out how to live the rest of my miserable life though I have come up with several ways I can shorten it. The only thing it’ll take it is […]

Deep Anguish

I just cut myself. The emotional anguish I feel is so great that nothing I did or thought about helped. I was near tears at every moment and indeed cried multiple times today. The Ex treated me to frozen yogurt and that calmed the child down for a little while but the rage, hopelessness, and […]

Weathering The Storm

I have a post that I wrote last week that hasn’t been published because it’s only halfway done. It’s probably the only hopeful post I have because since then, my life has taken a turn downwards.  At this time, things are looking bleak for me and its hard for me to not wallow in the […]