CW: Depression, suicide Spoiler for “The Magicians”, Season 4, Ep 13 If you’d like to indulge me, this is just me being distracted from doing my assignment into the realm of philosophical musings prompted by non-fictional characters and a TV show (“The Magicians”) that many have probably not even seen. I do this a lot […]
April 22nd 2018 marked my third anniversary for starting therapy. It’s been 3 years since I decided to take life by the rein, and actively work on my mental health. It has been life changing, and I’m truly all the better for it. It was (and still is) rough some days, but I had an […]
So it has been quite a hot minute since I last wrote anything here, huh? Well, I’m still alive. I’m still anxious. Still depressed. And still ADHD. Those thing have not changed, and I don’t think will ever change. I think I’ve finally come to terms with that and have decided instead to take each […]
Today, I’m proud of myself. Now, that’s quite a rare one, isn’t it? If you’ve been following my blog for a while now, you’d know that I have a high level of self-shame, self-hatred, and I find it hard to self-love. Lately however, I’ve been coming to terms with how I feel about myself and […]
Anyone who follows my Facebook, my blog, or knows me personally knows that I’ve been through a hellish year with processing the traumas of my life, processing a painful and messy divorce, battling suicidal thoughts and intents, battling self harming tendencies, processing my sexual orientation and what it means to be Christian despite it, dealing […]
“I know from the way you stroke my hair, the way you talk to me, the way you look at me, that you really love me,” Chérie said to me yesterday as we laid in bed. That made my heart melt. As someone who constantly feels like I’m never enough for anyone, it made me […]
I know some of you have been worried about me because I haven’t been active on WordPress or written in my blog. Things have been a whirlwind of intense emotions. I’m sometimes very distressed and depressed, and then other times feeling okay, feeling “fine”. The only good news I have for myself right now is […]
Today’s session with S went relatively well – as usual we always run out of time when we start to work really hard. I say relatively because I really enjoyed his company today, but I was also just feeling raw and weepy. I like how I can feel safe enough to go to his office […]
Note: As usual, this is a long one – usually the posts titled “Thoughts From Therapy” are going to be really long doozy posts to read. S’ expression was worry and/or concern almost the whole time through our session today. Hey, I’d be too if I were the psychologist and my client comes in and […]
Trigger warning: This post might trigger anxiety attacks because of what I’ll be talking about. It’s 10.35am and I’m stressed out to nearly the point of being overwhelmed. I’m close. Any more and I’ll definitely be in the red zone. I think the source of my stress came from thinking too far ahead – I […]
Hitting Reset 